In last week's Scoop, we discussed 2 common strategies that we often learn from a young age to “survive”: controlling and people-pleasing. Today, I’m going to dive into the other two: isolating and distracting.*
Isolating: this strategy can look like emotional or physical withdrawal. For me, isolation shows up as quitting, breaking off relationships, and leaving situations that I don't like. The thought is, “Well, I don't want to deal with this anymore, so I'm just going to walk away.” At its worst, isolation can cause us to disconnect and break rapport with other people, or run away from challenging experiences that could lead to growth and transformation. potentially positive experiences.
Distracting: this strategy is all about staying busy, multi-tasking and not leaving any space for silence, which could lead to having to deal with what's REALLY happening. I run this program a lot. Amara says that distractors “keep themselves safe by staying busy and checked out.” We all have distractions, and many of us have distractions that prevent us from really dealing with what's going on. Instead of feeling our feelings and facing discomfort (which is often the best indicator of where we need to make a change), we may spend hours on Facebook, eating, working out, gossiping, or any number of other distractions. Working is probably the BIGGEST distraction that we let get in the way.
So, how do YOU use isolation and distraction, and are these strategies preventing you from facing some important truths?